gonna start doing some work here before long hopefully so keep watch.

also just decided to quit smoking after 9 years , so far off em for about 1 1/2 days wish me luck.

thanks

today after i got off work i can home to a message on my phone with the worst news in my life

i learned that on nov 20 2008 my ex girlfriend Heather had died in a car accedent
and i just learned of this today ( happy new year huh )

heres her memorial myspace page

[link]

i havent seen her in person in 5 years, though i got to speak with her mid last year on yahoo (after a my coworker serena had met her elsewhere i think of serena as my angel cause i wanted to apollogize sooner but could never find her) in which i got to make amends with how i left her i was the dumbest person in the world to leave her in the first place and now i hear this news i can't help but wonder if i had stayed with her would of this had happend only god knows but I give thanks to god for putting serena in place so i could make amends before her early tragic death

the reason this is such a big deal to me is that she was my first true love and the one who loved me more than i could love her apparently the reason I left her was stupid, i was young stupid and did'nt know how good i had it i did'nt know the meaning of true love at the time enough to be able to work through minor problems.

like i said i got to apollogize, to some that may seem enough to free themselves from a situation like this for me this will be a lifelong nightmare and it's one mistake i will never ever let happen again.

to her i'll say: Heather you were always forgiving of my mistakes and you never did anything wrong and i place all blame on me for how i just walked out on you when you were in need of just someone who cared , as you heard before I'm much different now and theres nothing i'll ever be able to do to make up for it in life or death but know that you hold a special place in my heart for the rest of my life as always i will never ask for forgiveness nor do i deserve it.
Love
Marshall

in loving memory forever

Heather Brown
06/07/90 - 11/20/08

you gotta post these rules ]
1. Post these rules
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random things about themselves.
3. Tagged ones should write a journal about these facts.
4. At the end, post 8 deviants. < DONT DO THAT * i think*
5. Go to their page and tell them they're tagged.
6. No tag-backs(for obvious reasons)

ok randomness

1:I love very dark art.

2:I hate it when people go the way of the herd instead of being themselves

3:i like guns,swords,knifes anything like that.

4:the only subjects i ever passed in school were history and science.

5:i love Asian food and it's pretty much all i eat

6:i prefer cats over dogs unless there a quiet dog

7:I love music and will listen to pretty much everything

8:most importantly i think people should keep their beliefs if even it means the death of them.

And i tag no one

nothing much more than that, other than, some people are starting to annoy me (don't worry it's none of yall on here ) , my tv i just bought yesterday is defective so i gotta take it back and hopefully get a working one. all in all on top of all this i can;t think of anything i could do for a living thats better than my current job and it;s pretty crappy, i probly going to leave DA to so i'm not wasting anyones time anymore.

so in advance thanks to all who liked my work and to those who did'nt well fuck you tooj/k

anyway cya